Part Two of my illness Journey. First, let me say that I am not telling my story to give any medical advice. Please see a doctor before stopping or starting any treatment. Ok, that's out fo the way, so here we go. A dear friend of my helped me get in with two of his alternative doctors, one a Naturopath, one a Chinese Medicine doctor. Both saw me for much longer than any regular doctor. I was given several different herbs. I stopped taking my medicine and started taking my herbs. The herbs worked well for me, and they don't have the side effects that my medication had. In talking with the Natrupathic/Herbalist, he told me about leaky gut. Many questions were about my digestion, which was not good. I told him about my food intolerances, and the food I had cut out since I had gotten ill. He said I should continue on that path, as he believed that autoimmune disease are caused by leaky gut, so I need to fix that, which was the root of the problem. Some of the herbs were for my thyroid, some for my gut health. As time went on, I had times when I'd start to feel off, but those would soon subside and I would feel better again. The times I felt bad got farther and farther apart. My bloodwork all came back normal. My doctor, and Endocrynologist, said he wasn't even sure I had Graves Disease. He believed I just had Hashimotos and had a flare-up which caused me to go hyperthyroid. If you don't know what Graves or Hashimotos is, I'll try to give you a brief description. Graves attacks a person's thyroid, causing it to make too much thyroid hormone. This causes a person to loose weight (no, it isn't a good thing, you loose to much, no matter how much you eat, and you feel weak and frail, and you can have muscle wasting), their heart beats too fast (and can lead to other cardiac issues), they feel constantly perturbed and unable to sleep or rest, sometimes it attacks the eyes as well, cause pain and buldging. These are just a few things that can happen, it basically puts a body into overdrive. Hashimotos can do the opposite. It attacks the thyroid and prevents it from making enough thryroid hormone. This causes weight gain, heart palpitation (can eventually lead to other cardiac issues, hair loss, tiredness, just to name a few. For Graves they have to stop the thyroid from producing so much hormone, for Hashimotos, they have to add thyroid hormone. It is generally said that it is easier to add than to take away. I am still taking my herbs, my Endocrynologist dismissed me and told me to call if I feel bad again, he marked me clear of Graves but he marked that I do have Hashimotos. Hashimotos can go into remission, a person just has to wait and see. Now, I don't feel normal. I feel much better than I did, but I still don't feel right yet. I have been told to rest when I don't feel well, I shouldn't push myself. I have to be very careful with what I do, even what I watch. I find that emotional stress, whether it is intense movies or arguments, make the symptoms come back on. I feel this is very stress related for me. My stomach has always been sensitive to stress as well. I would get in a stressful situation and suddenly need a bathroom quite urgently. My worry is that, in this modern world, stress is all around us and very difficult to avoid. I can't be in a bubble at all times. I'm now trying to make sure I make time for myself, to try and de-stress, to meditate, to just try and enjoy life. I'm also trying to learn to let go. I have struggled with mistakes in my past, and now I have to look at myself as I would look at my child; I have to love myself, learn from my mistakes, and let them go. Dwelling on past mistakes is the path to illness. I still worry though, I'm still on my herbs, still wondering what will happen when I quit taking them, worried that this will always be on my mind, something haunting me. Now, as with letting go of the past, I know I have to move past that worry as well. On days when I wake up and feel good, I tell myself that I musn't look too far ahead, just enjoy the day, enjoy the time I do have. If I am lucky, I can have several years, maybe the rest of my life, with no further thyroid issues. It has happened for some people. I must be positive, and tell myself that my health will last. I also think a lot about what is happening to us. Why is it just accepted that all these twenty and thrity something women are becoming so ill? I've read a lot of possible causes: GMOs, fluoride in the water, iodine added to the food, toxins sprayed on the food, chemicals from plastic, chemicals in make-up, etc. Now I believe the human body has a wonderful capacity for healing. It wants to heal, to feel good, to flourish and thrive. But we are now exposed to so many more chemicals than any other humans have been at any other point in history. I wonder if we were only exposed to one or two if most of us could clear them, but are our bodies now being overwhelmed? How much can a body take before it goes "crazy" for a lack of better word, and begins to mess up? Or maybe that isn't it at all. What do you think? If you are reading this looking for some answers, I hope you find some somewhere, and I wish you health and happiness.